


You Are More

by deanlovescastielkisses



Series: Tumblr Prompts [4]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bottom Dean, Demon Cure, Demon Dean, First Time, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, M/M, Top Castiel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-31
Updated: 2014-10-31
Packaged: 2018-02-23 08:45:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2541494
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deanlovescastielkisses/pseuds/deanlovescastielkisses
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>the-hearts-of-a-timelord asked: Okay so I have a prompt for you. Instead of Sam being the one to turn Dean back to human it’s Cas. And demon Dean is saying all these terrible things and Cas knows it’s not really Dean saying those things but he’s still hurt. After Dean is human again Dean feels super guilty and they have to talk to work it out and maybe it turns into sexy times, but that can be up to you. Please?</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Are More

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I'm gonna write this as 'if Sam does the curing, he finishes the trials' so therefore Cas has to do it. Also, there's some major plot holes in this, and I am sorry for that.
> 
> Spoilers for 10x03 (kinda).

**Hour 1:**

"You're wasting your time here, angel. There's no point in trying to bring the old Dean back." He smiles, wickedly. 

Sam sits back, watching nervously as Cas silently injects the first dose of cured blood into the demon's forearm.

Dean smiles up at Cas, "See? Nothing."

"We'll see about that." He mumbles as he turns away.

He and Sam exit the dungeon.

**Hour 2:**

This time, Cas comes back alone.

"You know, I've been sitting here, thinking about all the shit that I've always wanted to say to you about how fucked up my life is because of you."

Cas clenches his jaw and remains silent as he prepares the next injection.

Dean laughs softly, "You dragging my ass out of hell and helping Sam kick start the Apocalypse was a great start on our little friendship, huh? All the lies you spit out, and I was a complete idiot for believing that you actually cared about any of us."

Cas flinches slightly at the accusations. But he remains focused on the task at hand. He stabs Dean in the forearm and pushes the blood in.

Dean lets out a yell and throws his hand back, panting. "You're gonna fucking regret this, Cas. Just add it to your list."

Cas throws the needle down and walks out, silent, door slamming shut behind him.

* * *

He finds Sam and sits with him.

"How's it going in there?"

"He's...it's hard to tell. I'm trying to not let it get to me." Cas mumbles.

"Let what get to you?"

"His...comments. They're rather hurtful. But, from what I understand, he's just trying to get in my head. To make me stop."

"You can't let him get to you, Cas. That's not  _Dean_  talking."

"I know." He sighs as he watches the clock, waiting for the next hour.

**Hour 3:**

He takes a deep breath before he opens the door to the dungeon, trying to gather his composure before facing the demon again.

"Whatcha thinking about, Cas?" He smiles, wickedly.

"Do you want my honest answer?"

"That would be refreshing, considering you have a knack for lying to me all the time."

Cas chuckles lightly, deciding it would be best to answer Dean's question later.

He has the needle prepared and as he's walking over Dean lunges at him with a snarl, eyes flashing black. Cas withdraws his hand with a startle. "Your acts of aggression with get you no where, Dean. Please stop fighting this." He quickly stabs Dean on the side of the neck and injects the third round.

**Hour 4:**

"Remember Purgatory, Cas?"

He flinches, knowing what's next.

"You told me why you left me, stranded in the woods with thousands of monsters out there dying to sink their teeth into me. But that's all bullshit."

"I told you, I was trying to-"

"Fuck you! If you were _trying_ to protect me, then you would've stayed by my side and helped me fight our way out of there. Even after a whole fucking year, I was still looking for you. And then when I did find you, you fucking lied to me again, and sent me back home. Thinking that I had failed you. I walked around out here for weeks, pissed off at the world because I thought that I had let you down. Fuck you, Cas."

Cas clenches his fists at his sides, trying to reel his anger back in. He's not mad at Dean, because everything he's saying is true.

"I'm sorry." He says quietly as he injects Dean in the forearm.

"Shove it up your ass."

He turns and walks out of the dungeon. With the doors closed behind him, he leans back against it and slides down to the floor, head hanging between his arms that are wrapped around his knees.

He doesn't go and find Sam. He just sits as he dwells on Dean's words.

**Hour 5:**

"Why the fuck do you even care about me right now?! You're always too busy dealing with heaven's bullshit to even care about me! I don't need you!" Dean yells, fighting back tears.

Cas is on the verge of tears at this point. Everything that he has done to hurt Dean is being brought up and if only Dean knew that it was never his intention to hurt him. It was the exact opposite actually. But he could never say that. Not after all of this pain that Dean is being put through. He could never fix what he did and he could never make things right.

“Dean, I’m sorry.”

Dean hangs his head and sighs, “You’re not sorry. You’re never sorry. Because you keep doing it. You keep running off on me.” He finishes quietly.

Cas walks over to Dean slowly, and Dean only flinches slightly when Cas brings the needle to his skin and pushes in.

**Hour 6:**

Cas opens the door to the dungeon and sees Dean hunched over in his seat, unconscious.

He rushes over to him and shakes his shoulders, “Dean! Hey! Wake up! Dean!” He shakes him a little harder and Dean slowly opens his eyes and looks at Cas, but quickly looks back down, as if ashamed.

“Where were you, Cas?” He asks quietly.

“When?”

“All those times I prayed to you. I never used to pray. But you…you changed that in me. And I prayed to you all the time. But…you never came when I needed you. You only came when you needed me.” He’s still looking at the ground.

Cas kneels beside Dean, resting his hand on Dean’s knee. Dean flinches away from it, though.

He takes a deep breath, trying to keep his voice from cracking, “I’m here now, Dean.”

He brings the needles to Dean’s arm and waits for Dean to flinch from it like he always did, but he doesn’t. He just takes it. He yells when Cas pushes in the blood, though. The pain surging through his veins like fire and he struggles in his seat, trying to get away from it, but the ties on his wrist keep him in the chair.

‘Ahh! Fuck! Ahh!” He continues yelling in pain.

Cas takes a step back, scared at what this is doing to Dean. But Dean pants a couple times, catching his breath until he looks up at Cas. “Just go, Cas. It’s what you’re good at.”

Cas cannot wait for this to be over. He doesn’t know what’s going to come from it, but he just wants Dean back.

**Hour 7:**

“I don’t know what’s happening to me, Cas…” His cheeks are stained with tears as he looks over at Cas.

“You’re healing. It’s a painful process, but it needs to happen. We need you back. I…need you back.”

Dean looks up at him with a soft expression, “Really?”

“Yes.”

A soft smile appears on his face, but it’s quickly replaced by a painful expression as Cas injects him again.

Dean whimpers as Cas pulls the needle out.

“Cas…” he whispers, “…please…”

With a trembling hand, Cas reaches out and caresses Dean’s cheek.

He looks down at him, “I’m here, Dean.” He whispers.

**Hour 8:**

Sam decides to join in with Cas for this last injection since it requires a little bit more than what they’ve been doing for the past 8 hours.

“Holy shit.” Sam whispers as he steps inside the dungeon, taking a look at how defeated and broken his brother is right now. “Let’s get this over with, okay?”

“I couldn’t agree with you more.”

He and Sam develop a plan that requires Cas to do the final injection, as well as the ‘bloody hand slap over the mouth thingy’ that they still haven’t come up with a proper name for, while Sam chants the incantation.

Dean lifts his head and watches in silence as Cas and Sam prepare everything. They are finally ready and they approach him.

“Guys…” Dean whispers weakly as he looks up at them.

“We’re here, Dean.” Sam says. “Just one more to go, okay?"

“I don’t…” he pants, “I don’t want this…please…”

“Dean, we have to finish this. Come on…here, Cas.” Sam hands him the last needle.

“I can’t live knowing what I did as a demon…please…just-“

Cas walks over to Dean and places his hand on Dean’s shoulder, “You are a good man, Dean Winchester.”

Dean flinches away, “No…”

“Dean, please believe me. You are the greatest man to ever walk this earth. Yes, you have made some horrible decisions in the past, we all have, but your intentions were nothing but pure. You had no control over what the Mark had done to you. Please. Don’t give up. Not after everything we’ve been through.”

Dean struggles to make eye contact with Cas, so he settles with staring down at the floor. “It’ll be better for everyone if you just let me die.”

“Not for me.” Cas says, trying to find Dean’s eyes. “A world without you is not worth living in.” He finishes quietly.

Sam politely clears his throat, not wanting to interrupt this, but they really need to do something soon if they’re wanting to cure Dean.

Cas walks away from Dean and over to Sam, “You ready?”

“Yeah. You?”

“About as ready as I’ll ever be. I just hope that he will be able to come back from this.”

“He will. We always come back from things like this.”

Cas holds the final needle against Dean's forearm as he sits there, almost unconscious.  
  
"Cas..." He breathes.   
  
"I'm here, Dean."  
  
"I'm so sorry." He whispers.   
  
Cas doesn't respond, his heart breaks though.   
  
He looks back at Sam who gives him a nod and Cas sinks the needles in and presses the blood in.   
  
They have to move quickly.   
  
Sam begins chanting the incantation, "Exorcizamus te, ominus immundus spiritus. Hanc animam redintegra, lustra! Lustra!"  
  
Cas slits his palm and presses it against Dean's mouth. A bright, white light engulfs Dean and it disappears as quickly as it arrived.   
  
Cas and Sam step back, wide-eyed, waiting for Dean to move in some way.   
  
He finally stirs in his seat and looks up at them.   
  
Sam rushes to Dean's side, untying his wrists, "Dean? Hey. You okay?" He rests his hand on Dean's shoulder.   
  
Dean shifts uneasily in his seat, but eventually sinks into Sam's touch, sobbing.   
  
"I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry." Is all Dean can say as Sam wraps his arms around his brother.   
  
Sam tries to pull away, but Dean keeps him close, unable to let go as he continues sobbing.   
  
After a couple minutes of silence, aside from Dean's sobs, Sam is able to let go and he steps back as Dean wipes the tears from his eyes.   
  
Cas walks up to Sam and pats his shoulder. Sam doesn't need to say how hard it is to see his brother so broken like this, so Cas quietly mumbles, "I'll take care of him."  
  
Sam nods and walks out of the dungeon.

* * *

Cas walks over and crouches beside Dean, but Dean quickly stands up and walks away to stand on the opposite side of the dungeon. 

"Cas, please...I can't..."  
  
"Dean. It's okay." He coos.   
  
"No! It's not okay, Cas! All the shit I did! Everything I said to you! I remember all of it and I just..." He trails off, trying to hold back tears.   
  
Cas has known Dean for years now, and sometimes, you have to show him instead of tell him. So he walks over and quickly wraps his arms around him, bringing him in for a hug.   
  
Dean squirms in Cas' arms, but the desire to be touched, held, and loved by someone takes over and he settles into Cas, slowly wrapping his arms around his waist.   
  
Dean's sobs continue to pour from him and Cas continues to hold him.   
  
"I'm so glad that you're back, Dean." He whispers. "I'm so glad."  
  
"Cas..." He sniffles.   
  
"Shh.." He presses his forehead against Dean's, trying to ground him. And Dean sinks into it.   
  
"You are more than the sum of your past mistakes, Dean."   
  
Dean leans in and softly presses his lips against Cas'. "I'm not."  
  
Again, Cas thinks that it's better to show Dean than tell him so he kisses him again. This time, it's deeper and slower. His tongue seeking entrance and Dean opens for him. He moans quietly and breaks it, still resting his head against Cas'.   
  
"I'm so sorry. For everything. I'm such a fucking asshole. I don't deserve you."  
  
"I choose you. Whether or not you deserve me is irrelevant."  
  
"You're gonna have to keep telling me that from time to time."  
  
"I plan on it." He smiles softly as he presses his lips against Dean's. 

* * *

They all settle in silence in the rec room of the bunker.   
  
"I'm gonna go to bed. You should do the same, Dean." Sam sighs as he stands up, quickly pats his brother's shoulder and heads towards his room.   
  
Cas looks over at Dean, "Are you going to bed?"  
  
"Come with me? I really don't want to be alone right now." He hates how fucking needy he is right now. But he's finally over hiding his need for the angel.   
  
Cas doesn't respond with words, but by grabbing Dean's hand and pulling him towards his bedroom.  
  
As soon as Cas closes his door, Dean is in his personal space, pressing him against the door and kissing him.   
  
Cas doesn't know if Dean is in the right frame of mind for this so he objects, "Dean. You...you were just healed. Are you sure?" He's always wanted this. He's always wanted Dean. But he wants Dean to want it too.   
  
"Please, Cas." He sobs again. "I need you. Please." He wraps his arms around Cas, sobbing against his neck. "Please..." He whispers.   
  
He finds Dean's lips with his own and softly pushes him back towards his bed. He lays him down and straddles his hips, never breaking their kiss.   
  
Dean arches his back off the mattress as Cas grinds his hips into Dean's.  
  
Dean needs and he needs it now. He frantically moves to help Cas take his clothing off but Cas stills him. He grabs Dean's wrists and places them on the mattress. "Let me take care of you." He says with authority, but also with love.   
  
He slowly undresses Dean and moves in to kiss him. He begins to slowly pepper kisses down his jaw into his chest and down his stomach.   
  
Dean whimpers below him, "Cas..."  
  
"I'm here, Dean." He reassures as he rubs his hand across the planes of Dean's chest.   
  
Dean's erection hangs heavy against his thigh and Cas wraps his fingers around it as he leans up to kiss Dean.   
  
A moan escapes Dean's lips that almost sounds like a sob. Cas begins to pump him as he rests his forehead against Dean's. More whimpers and moans escape from Dean's lips as Cas moves down to kiss his neck, fist still slowly pumping up and down Dean's shaft.   
  
"Cas...please...I need you...please..." He adjusts his head to find Cas' lips with his own.   
  
"Okay." Cas whispers as he moves down. His lips peppering more kisses down Dean's abdomen until his breath is ghosting against his already leaking cock. He softly licks the tips and Dean's response is more than what he would hope for as his back arches off the bed and his fingers curl into the sheets.   
  
He wraps his lips around the head and sinks all the way down, swallowing him completely. Dean moans as Cas begins to bob up and down.   
  
Cas' fingers wraps around Dean's balls and he squeezes them lightly, bringing yet another wonderful noise from Dean's lips. His fingers trail back and begin poking at Dean's tight entrance.   
  
"Go, Cas. Please. Do it." He pants. "Please."  
  
Cas obliges and sinks his lips around Dean's cock once more as his finger presses into his entrance. It's tight, so he wiggles his finger slightly as he thrusts it in and out. Once loose enough, he adds another finger. A third finger is added and he curls them and Dean responds with a yelp, "Oh, fuck. Cas. Please. Do that again. Please." He breathes, absolutely wrecked.   
  
Cas pops his lips off of Dean's cock and moves up to his lips. Dean can taste himself on Cas' tongue, but he doesn't care.   
  
Cas breaks the kiss to remove his clothing and he spreads Dean's knees as he settles between them. He leans down to kiss him again. Dean bites his bottom lip and releases it with a pop and Cas moans from it.   
  
"Lube's in my top drawer." He whispers.   
  
Cas reaches over and pops the lid, applying a fair amount to his fingers. He presses them into Dean, realizing how much easier they slide in now and Dean moans obscenely. He uses what's left of the lube in his fingers to apply to his own aching cock.   
  
He lines up and slowly slides his cock into Dean. They both let out a soft moan when he bottoms out.  
  
Cas' jaw goes slack from the wonderful sensation and Dean arches up to kiss him. "Move, babe. Please. Fuck me." He whispers and Cas quickly obliges. His thrusts are slow and intentional. He doesn't want this to be frantic sex. He wants to make love to Dean. To show him how loved he is despite everything in his past.   
  
Dean wraps his legs and arms around Cas to help with the thrusting. He thinks that if he were to let Cas go, then he would disappear. And that thought alone almost makes Dean sick.   
  
Cas leans down and kisses along Dean's shoulders and onto his neck. "You're so good, Dean." He kisses his lips. "Everything about you is good."  
  
"Please, Cas..." He protests.   
  
"You are worthy, Dean..." Cas growls into his ear. Dean's whole body vibrates from Cas' tone and it helps him to believe it.   
  
Cas' thrusts are a little bit harder now, slamming against Dean's prostate.   
  
"Cas...I'm so close...please..." He whimpers.   
  
Cas moans in acknowledgment. He grabs and handful of Dean's hair and tugs it, exposing Dean's neck and he softly nibbles on the flesh there, peppering wet kisses as well. He nibbles on the shell of Dean's ear, "Come for me, Dean." His voice demanding and rough. Even more so than usual.  
  
Dean clenches and spurts of white hot come paint his and Cas' stomach as he lets out a yell.   
  
Dean's orgasm pushes Cas off into his own. He comes inside Dean, panting and moaning with each spurt. Dean leans up and kisses him softly. Cas pulls out and rolls over, bringing Dean into his chest.  
  
Dean lazily kisses Cas' chest and Cas runs a soothing hand up and down Dean's back.

* * *

 

"Cas?" He asks softly after a few minutes of comfortable silence.  
  
"Hmm?"  
  
"I..I love you. I don't deserve you to love me back because I am the biggest fuck up in all of humanity but-"  
  
Cas cuts him off by yanking him up into a kiss. "I love you, too." He smiles at how easy it is for him to say it. "You've made mistakes, Dean, but have you met me?"  
  
"But this is different. I-"  
  
"Shh." He caresses Dean's cheek. "We'll deal. We always do. But right now, you need to sleep."  
  
"Stay here with me, Cas?"  
  
"Of course."  
  
Dean gets lulled to sleep by the steady rhythm of his head on Cas' chest and the soft fingers brushing against his back. 


End file.
